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Christmas Gift for An Iranian Queer Asylum Seeker in London (December 25, 08) Patrick Williams
I have been asked to write this so that others can take from it and possibly help other LGBT Iranians both in the UK and around the world who are fleeing due to their sexuality.
I am a director of Pride London, the largest LGBT Pride event in the UK, and if someone like me was not moved to help then God knows who would be, when I read Ali's story I was deeply saddened as in my country, "The United kingdom" this should never happen. We, who pride ourselves on our freedom and Civil Rights allowed someone like Ali to be on the streets and be homeless and forced to survive by doing things which he felt were so beneath him that he hated himself so much for it, he tried to end his life. I began to feel responsible and had to do something. I got in-touch with Arsham Parsi, executive director of IRQR and asked how I could help and offered my home and any assistance I could. Ali came to see me in November for a few days and stayed with me, a very short break, away from what is a very bad life and existence, and while he was here he was prone to spells of deep depression and would withdraw. I realized that this was something that he needed to work out for himself but also he needed to have someone nearby who would be around to pick up the pieces if need be, it was hard going at first and at times I felt that I am not sure I was doing the right thing and may have bitten off more than I could chew. But I continued and when he returned to Liverpool I kept in touch ringing him at least three to four times a week to make sure he was ok. I then decided on my next move and that was to bring him back to London for Christmas and New Year to spend it with me. I felt in my heart that this year I could not spend this festive period enjoying myself when I knew that someone else was sitting in a room alone and not coming out. This was how Ali spends his days sitting in his room in Liverpool and only venturing out to sign at the Immigration centre or to get food or to the Library or to the doctor, he did have another friend who was closer in proximity to him than I was This man lived in Stoke on Trent but again this would have problems as he had an elderly mother who would need him to spend Christmas with him. I decided to buy Ali a ticket to come to London and I bought the first one which was a problem as the Immigration centre told Ali they would not alter his time of signing to allow him to travel to London for Christmas. (My own countrymen would not let a vulnerable young man spend this time with someone who would look after him, this made me angry and very horrified as to how we as a nation were becoming, I wanted to come to Liverpool and ask that person if this was him how he would feel, But I decided not to and let the matter resolve itself). We have forgotten the meaning of lending someone a helping hand. Well needless to say Ali changed as well, when he heard this news he decided that he did not want me to change the ticket for a later time but that he would come over New Year as he would be too depressed over the holiday period to be around people. I felt that I had let him down, that I had failed and did not know what to do then, I decided to ring Arsham Parsi and spoke to him and told him what Ali had said and that I would feel very upset as I was leaving him to sit in his room over the Christmas period alone. Arsham told me he will ring and speak to Ali and he did, so in a nut shell it was not just me but IRQR and his friends who all rallied around in one way or another to convince him that being away from his solitary room in Liverpool over this period was a good thing. Well to cut a long story short I got him a later time of travel before Christmas which he took and is here with me now. Meanwhile during all this time I was the go between for Ali and his solicitor who I got a lot of information from as to what he needed for his case and again immediately got in-touch with Arsham Parsi at IRQR to help and the most amazing thing happened Arsham has a lot of contacts within Iran who could get the information and be a credible source, this was needed by the Home Office. Once Arsham had the information he put it in an official format with IRQR letter head showing that they are a legitimate NGO and support organization for LGBT Iranians fleeing their country. Once I had this I forwarded it immediately to his solicitor who was astonished that we got this information. He then submitted it to the Home Office and we are now awaiting a reply. (You see, even though Ali's sexuality is not disputed by the Home Office, what is disputed is whether he would be safe or not if he was to return to Iran, this document showed that he would not be safe) Anyway I had a few more things to do yet, as I wanted this Christmas for Ali to be special, so I got him some presents, and a stocking and filled it with little gifts and sweets, and hid them and told him on Christmas morning that Santa Clause had dropped by and left these for him, (Why! Because he, Ali , was a good man and that he had friends who cared for him, this was especially important as he had lost so much of his own self esteem and it was important to make him feel a sense of worth) we baked the Christmas cake and prepared all the vegetables before Christmas, and on Christmas morning I got up and started to cook the main Christmas lunch. The big moment came, which was for him to open his gifts, which he did and it was looking at a child who was so excited about getting presents and what was in them, to me that was all worth it, just seeing his face light up, and then when he emptied his stocking which had the words "My First Christmas" filled with little gifts and sweets and lots of practical things for him, he was overwhelmed, well I felt good, having made someone feel happy, and the best gift was not once did he go into any depression or feel alone as he was here and felt supported and loved. It was all worth it, and I would do it again and again. It was not much to do as I would be doing this anyway at Christmas, and normally I spend it alone as prefer to do so, but I felt someone needed me more than I needed to be selfish. (Which I realized I tend to be at Christmas a bit as I love to be on my own, but it felt good to have him here and spend this time with me) Helping someone is no big thing it takes very little from you to do, and sometimes it is reaching out to those that really need you the most at times like these that are so good. I don't want anything in return except to make sure that IRQR get funding to continue to support LGBT Iranians when they need them. Had it not been for Arsham I would not have know about Ali, and certainly had it not been for him we would not have the independent evidence to give to the Home Office to help. So in a nut shell my main reason for writing this is for two reasons: 1. If you are someone who would like to help another LGBT Iranian then just go and do it, they are the most thankful and considerate people I have known, and they are long suffering friends. It feels good on the inside when you do, and you can support them, also speak to your Local MP and get them to help as this goes a long way. The more pressure there is put on the Home office and this Government to stop keeping LGBT people like Ali, who is like me or any other gay person living in the UK with our freedoms and rights, from becoming useful and taking their place in this country. 2. Help support IRQR and send them any funds you can, as they have no money what so ever, I intend to make this a focus within Pride London through some of the committees that I serve on and through other sources like the Unions to regularly support this NGO, as this kind of work comes with a Price. And I am happy to help in anyway I can to support.
Patrick Williams Director PRIDE LONDON LOGO white bg
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I
subscribed to IRQR and because of this I get information regularly about
LGBT Iranians who are suffering in the UK and need support. It was through
one of these subscriptions that I found out about Ali, a young Iranian who
found himself in hard times in London two years ago, this had a
significant effect on his health and mental wellbeing so much so that he
tried to take his life and also was sectioned under the UK mental Health
act for his own safety this process as being going on till now. But he was
eventually moved to Liverpool and it was while he was there I heard about
him and immediately wrote about how I could help.